Not dead. Yet.

Ha! Bet you thought I was dead.

I am not. I just haven't had anything update worthy. The older I get the less I feel I can get away with stream of consciousness entries, but I can not focus when typing on a computer. (Computers are so counter-intuitive to how I work, especially when it comes to writing. When I write on paper, I turn the paper sideways and have my hand perpendicular to my body. It has never felt natural to type on a keyboard, which only adds to my lack of focus when trying to write something.)

Anyway. So I've been trying to reduce my stress lately to keep myself from imploding, but it's not working out that great. My work days have gotten insane, with overtime every. friggin. day. And yet my paycheck is sad and pitiful. Spending 10+ hours, five days a week at work is killing me.

My family isn't helping keep stress levels low, either. Last Friday, my gram had back surgery- a surgery that was postponed for two years because her doctor wanted her hips replaced first to avoid any other complications. And she spent several additional days in the hospital because, surprise, she had complications. It's so, so hard to be away from her when she's going through these things. If she had asked, I would have gladly quit my job and moved in with her to take care of her.

Then, Sunday, Anton was staying late after work,and when he was about, oh, 528 feet from home, was rear-ended by a ditz from the next town over...who had her mommy call to see if she could talk Anton out of reporting the accident to the insurance company. Apparently, her little princess was going to lose her insurance if she was in any more accidents. I just...What the fuck? He's fine, the car should be back next week since it was mostly superficial damage, but...I mean, really? She called 5 times before giving up. Get your fucktard daughter some driving lessons or keep that idjit of the road.

THEN! One of my younger cousins was turning into his driveway Thursday on his motorcycle  and was hit by some moron. Now, I hate motorcycles because I see them as death traps on two wheels, and I think I've seen maybe 2 motorcyclists in my adult life that obeyed any traffic laws. However. My cousin is a safe driver, and he babies that bike. Babied. The bike is destroyed. At least there was no major damage to him but he's got a pretty bad case of whiplash and is all  bruised up.

I should say both accidents happened in broad daylight, and both driver's said that they didn't see the person they hit. Then maybe you need glasses and no license.

So. It's hard to relax when I want to cause severe bodily harm to people who insist on hurting my family. And to the people I have to spend my days on the phone with.  Sigh. This past week and the next two I have four day work weeks. Maybe the will help kick start some zen like atmosphere in my life.

Probably not.